Alone

I've said it before and I'll say it again...On a day to day basis, I don't mind doing the long-distance thing. I'm grateful that things between the Affianced and I are such that we can trust and respect each other enough to be in different states without any kind of crises. But there are times, like tonight, when people were over visiting and playing games, and then left in pairs, or when I see new lovey-dovey relationships sprouting up around me, when I feel lonely. I mean, the lovey-doviness kind of makes me want to barf, and I truly appreciate and I truly do enjoy my alone time so I can regroup...but there's a part of me that wishes I didn't have to sit around here alone at the end of each day. It sucks not to have another presence in the apartment, now that my roommate is essentially living with her boyfriend. And it sucks to be the person who is in a couple, but not be able to actually be in a couple here.

Just a little self-pity. But hey, it beats having a random stroke, going into a coma, and waking up, only to find that the only functioning muscle in your body is your eye, and then having to develop a system of communication through blinking. (I saw The Diving Bell and the Butterfly last night. Sad.)