This meme has been flying around on facebook, and I figured I may as well post it here as well. It was a good opportunity for some self-reflection:
1) I love food. I also love cooking and baking, thankfully.
2) I am extremely thankful that my parents raised us Catholic. I have a couple major beefs with the Catholic church (including their stand on homosexuality and women in the priesthood), but my faith has been a big part of my life.
3) I crochet, and have gotten to the point where I can create things like sweaters and stuffed animals. Huge move from the old scarf rut.
4) I'm terrible at bowling...and I love it.
5) My life was empty before I began sleeping under an electric blanket.
6) I'm in the midst of a Vermont winter, and while it is causing a slight touch of SAD, I really am enjoying the snow after several years in the south.
7) Speaking of the south, I will never live there again.
8) I love my job teaching at an alternative high school. I think I have found my calling.
9) I think that doing good in the world is really important, but I hate when people get mushy about doing service. I don't want to reflect, I want to take action.
10) I must wear a watch at all times. I get extremely anxious if the time is not readily available.
11) I give blood regularly. I am type A+.
12) I want a Ph. D., but don't have any topic I like well enough to dedicate that much of my time and energy to.
13) When I was younger, I wanted to be a genetic counselor when I grew up. One semester of college chem changed my mind, but I still think it would be a cool job, and I'm not convinced you need the high-level science knowledge to perform it.
14) I miss my old SLR camera.
15) I always considered (and still do) myself to be very independent, which is why I felt cool traipsing around to places like Ireland, Australia, Lousiana, Virginia, and Vermont. Now that I'm an adult, thought, I totally get why people want to live close to family. I miss my zany parents and my brothers.
16) I don't do musical snobbery. I like to listen to music, and I certainly have my faves, but I hate sitting in on conversations where people just spit out hundreds of names of bands and artists and everyone else nods and "yeah!"s with great emphasis. I could also really care less about live music in general. I mean, if someone good is playing, cool, but "It has live music!" is not an advantage of a bar/restaurant for me.
17) I love trivia. Andy and I are well on our way to memorizing the deck of the 1981 Genus edition of Trivial Pursuit. We also watch Jeopardy nightly.
18) I am extremely grateful that my husband is intelligent in ways that are different from me.
19) For the first time in my life, I really GET the idea of multiple intelligences and see it playing around me daily. I mean, I understood it before, but didn't really see the true worth in the intelligences that weren't the typical school ones (i.e. linguistic and logical/mathematical). In my current job, however, there are teachers and students who blow me away with the combinations of intelligences they possess, and I think they're all amazing in the ways they work together to get things done.
20) I tap-danced for 11 years.
21) When I watch a stage performance, especially a musical, I feel a swelling in my chest and feel as if I will burst. I'm pretty sure that given the right circumstances, I could have been an amazing stage actress in musical theater.
22) I agonized for months over whether to change my name when I got married. I think I made a good choice.
23) I don't believe in soulmates or The One.
24) I address my parents by their first name.
25) I desperately wish I had a sewing machine and knew how to use one. My craftiness productivity would skyrocket.
Saturday, January 31, 2009
Saturday, January 24, 2009
I shall call you by a new name
I have a new name.
Those of you who keep up with the blog (all three of you) know that for some time before the wedding, the question of the name change was The Big Looming Question. Should I keep my name out of principle (i.e. Why should I have to change it when he doesn't?) or hyphenate as a nod toward having a family name and, ultimately, sharing a name with my children? Taking his name and dropping my own was never an option.
About three weeks before the weekend, after literally a year or more of waffling, I decided to hyphenate.
After a wedding in VT, you have to wait a bit to get your marriage certificate from the country clerk before you can get the name-change ball rolling. Ours came while we were away for the honeymoon, and since then, I've been chipping away at all the people who need to know my new name. Social security first, then bank, driver's license, etc. It's a process that, although time-consuming, I have not found to be troublesome in any way. It's one of those situations where people do this all the time, and it turns out that the world is pretty good at handling the steps.
The strange part is getting used to the new name. I don't feel absolutely wild about it, although I still feel good about the decision. But it's strange to call a place of business, like the gym where I want to get a membership, or my insurance company, and begin with, "Hi, my name is Rebecca Wxxxxx-Pxxxxx..." instead of just "Rebecca Wxxxxx." In fact, the other day I forgot my new name, used my old one, and when the woman went to look me up in the computer, I had to sheepishly correct her. It felt like I was committing fraud and didn't completely memorize the information from the person whose identity I was stealing.
And then there's the issue of just stating the name for people. When I had to get a new library card, and I was asked, "And what's your name?" I replied, "Rebecca Wxxxxx hyphen Pxxxxx. P-x-x-x-x-x." I need to stop saying "hyphen" as if it is part of my name and letting people ask the questions they need, but I'm not to the point where the name feels natural enough to NOT explain it. It's as if I'm anticipating their confusion because I still feel a bit of my own.
There's a part of me that's still a little sad that I have to be the only one to go through the process. Shouldn't this process of merging into a new family be equally shared by both partners? My heart says yes, but my head, which has done a lot of genealogical research in my day, recognizes the simplicity of the patrilineal system, and can appreciate that.
I think this benefit of this whole process is to remind me that marriage is a compromise. That we're an us now, and need to think that way much of the time. It's not an easy process, especially for someone who has clung with a death grip to her independence, but the lesson is an important one.
Those of you who keep up with the blog (all three of you) know that for some time before the wedding, the question of the name change was The Big Looming Question. Should I keep my name out of principle (i.e. Why should I have to change it when he doesn't?) or hyphenate as a nod toward having a family name and, ultimately, sharing a name with my children? Taking his name and dropping my own was never an option.
About three weeks before the weekend, after literally a year or more of waffling, I decided to hyphenate.
After a wedding in VT, you have to wait a bit to get your marriage certificate from the country clerk before you can get the name-change ball rolling. Ours came while we were away for the honeymoon, and since then, I've been chipping away at all the people who need to know my new name. Social security first, then bank, driver's license, etc. It's a process that, although time-consuming, I have not found to be troublesome in any way. It's one of those situations where people do this all the time, and it turns out that the world is pretty good at handling the steps.
The strange part is getting used to the new name. I don't feel absolutely wild about it, although I still feel good about the decision. But it's strange to call a place of business, like the gym where I want to get a membership, or my insurance company, and begin with, "Hi, my name is Rebecca Wxxxxx-Pxxxxx..." instead of just "Rebecca Wxxxxx." In fact, the other day I forgot my new name, used my old one, and when the woman went to look me up in the computer, I had to sheepishly correct her. It felt like I was committing fraud and didn't completely memorize the information from the person whose identity I was stealing.
And then there's the issue of just stating the name for people. When I had to get a new library card, and I was asked, "And what's your name?" I replied, "Rebecca Wxxxxx hyphen Pxxxxx. P-x-x-x-x-x." I need to stop saying "hyphen" as if it is part of my name and letting people ask the questions they need, but I'm not to the point where the name feels natural enough to NOT explain it. It's as if I'm anticipating their confusion because I still feel a bit of my own.
There's a part of me that's still a little sad that I have to be the only one to go through the process. Shouldn't this process of merging into a new family be equally shared by both partners? My heart says yes, but my head, which has done a lot of genealogical research in my day, recognizes the simplicity of the patrilineal system, and can appreciate that.
I think this benefit of this whole process is to remind me that marriage is a compromise. That we're an us now, and need to think that way much of the time. It's not an easy process, especially for someone who has clung with a death grip to her independence, but the lesson is an important one.
Friday, January 23, 2009
Give Life
Today, I got a bumper sticker for my car. This is a big deal for me. Growing up, George (my father) was very anti-bumper sticker. We would bring home the "My child is an honor student" stickers, and he would say "Oh, great!" and discreetly put them away in a stack in a drawer. Marring the outside of the car was a no-no.
But now I have a car. I dipped my toes into the pool of bumper stickers when I put the "Covered by the blood of Jesus" magnet on the back of my car. I admit to doing it somewhat in jest, but I keep it on there still today as a reminder of my crazy time in the South. Today, however, I found the bumper sticker that I feel confident I can put on my car without regret: a "Got Blood?" Red Cross blood donation sticker.
I've become a frequent blood donor over the last couple years. It began in Louisiana when they desperately needed blood after Hurricane Katrina. My good friend Rebecca was going, and asked me to come along. I said "Sure," and was hooked.
Giving blood is a nice feeling. I feel grateful that I can do it without passing out. I enjoy seeing how quickly I can fill my pint bag (in a safe way, of course: 5 minutes, 55 seconds today!). I like the rhythm of the Blood Donation Center here in town: people making packets of bags and tubes, people called into and out of the screening room, the friendly volunteer insisting you sit for ten minutes and eat a donut (Well, if I must). I also secretly adore walking out with a neon-colored bandage around my arm. It's a peaceful place, and ours is run efficiently, which I appreciate.
But beyond that, I think I like the idea that it's so simple to do something good. It's an easy act of giving, one that doesn't take a lot of time or money, but one that can have a huge impact. I don't think too often about where my blood goes, but to the people getting a tranfusion, I recognize it's a lifeline. Sometimes literally.
So I think I'll take the plunge, and put that sticker on my car. I may regret it if I ever want to sell the car, but for now, I'm pleased to have found a sticker I feel happy about.
But now I have a car. I dipped my toes into the pool of bumper stickers when I put the "Covered by the blood of Jesus" magnet on the back of my car. I admit to doing it somewhat in jest, but I keep it on there still today as a reminder of my crazy time in the South. Today, however, I found the bumper sticker that I feel confident I can put on my car without regret: a "Got Blood?" Red Cross blood donation sticker.
I've become a frequent blood donor over the last couple years. It began in Louisiana when they desperately needed blood after Hurricane Katrina. My good friend Rebecca was going, and asked me to come along. I said "Sure," and was hooked.
Giving blood is a nice feeling. I feel grateful that I can do it without passing out. I enjoy seeing how quickly I can fill my pint bag (in a safe way, of course: 5 minutes, 55 seconds today!). I like the rhythm of the Blood Donation Center here in town: people making packets of bags and tubes, people called into and out of the screening room, the friendly volunteer insisting you sit for ten minutes and eat a donut (Well, if I must). I also secretly adore walking out with a neon-colored bandage around my arm. It's a peaceful place, and ours is run efficiently, which I appreciate.
But beyond that, I think I like the idea that it's so simple to do something good. It's an easy act of giving, one that doesn't take a lot of time or money, but one that can have a huge impact. I don't think too often about where my blood goes, but to the people getting a tranfusion, I recognize it's a lifeline. Sometimes literally.
So I think I'll take the plunge, and put that sticker on my car. I may regret it if I ever want to sell the car, but for now, I'm pleased to have found a sticker I feel happy about.
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Grad school...redux
I am applying to grad school.
Again.
When I posted this status on facebook, my nerdy friends ohh-ed and ahh-ed and asked what programs I was looking at. I was ashamed to admit that it's another master's in education. This time in Middle School Social Studies and English.
But wait, one might say, I thought you already had a master's in education!
I do.
But wait, one might say, I thought you already had a license to teach middle school. Science right?
I do. But not in Vermont. Stupid state.
The world of interstate licensure for teachers is a vague and frustrating world. It is built on the premise that you will go to a four year college for education, and that you will stay in the same state for your entire career. Try to take some sort of alternative path or, (NO!) move to another state, and life becomes difficult.
The following is true:
-I want to be licensed to teach. Regardless of whether I need that license for my current job (I don't, although I get paid more when I have it).
-I could do another alternative licensure process and try to get licensed to teach Social Studies by making a ginormous portfolio and paying some committee more than $1000 to evaluate it. Then I would be licensed to teach SS in Vermont. But if I tried to move again, who knows.
The most long-term option is to suck it up, pay tuition, and go through a real master's of education program in teaching. Then, I will get a license from Vermont, and it will be recommended by a four-year accredited institution, which, as I have sadly found out, appears to be the key to this whole mess. Imagine...
Dorothy (Becky) goes up to the gate of the Emerald City (State Department of Ed). "What do you want?" asks the creepy man.
"I want to see the wizard (get a teaching license)," replies Dorothy (Becky).
"No."
"I graduate cum laude from the honors program at a top-twenty university."
"No."
"I have experience teaching. In a low-performing district. I made SIGNIFICANT GAINS!"
"No."
"I have a master's degree in education."
"Oh?"
*mumbles* "Gifted education."
"We don't have that in this place (Vermont)."
"Well, my colleague the scarecrow here has no brain and studied bulletin-board making in his undergraduate program. He has no content expertise, but he CAN create an attendance chart and time-out corner. It took him twenty tries to pass the Praxis, and even then he just squeaked by. But he has a teaching degree from an accredited college/university."
"Well, that's a horse of a different color! Come right in!"
I think that little sketch explains perfectly the problems I have with the education teaching system today (at least as far as licensure is concerned). I'm not saying that there AREN'T good teachers who go through the traditional path. I'm not saying that all teaching programs are bad. And I'm not saying that everyone who wants to teach should be able to just jump right in. But cut me some slack -- I'm not just a bum off the street who's never been in a classroom, here.
The downside to this new option is going into debt for another degree that I don't feel like I need in order to be a good teacher. The upside is having the degree and license that will make me truly mobile and give me career options. And it sucks for the short-term, but in the long-term, I think it's a good decision for us as a family. There are a lot of ifs that have to happen for this to work, however. 1. Andy has to find a job in Vermont so we can stay here. 2. Andy has to find a job that pays what our two incomes currently make so he can support me for the year (and oh, how I cringe to say that). 3. My job has to agree to take me back, because my life will be a sad sad place if this job doesn't exist for me anymore. 4. My three recommenders have to actually WRITE the letters of recommendation.
But, for the time being, the name of the game is keeping options open. And from many angles, this appears to be a good one.
Again.
When I posted this status on facebook, my nerdy friends ohh-ed and ahh-ed and asked what programs I was looking at. I was ashamed to admit that it's another master's in education. This time in Middle School Social Studies and English.
But wait, one might say, I thought you already had a master's in education!
I do.
But wait, one might say, I thought you already had a license to teach middle school. Science right?
I do. But not in Vermont. Stupid state.
The world of interstate licensure for teachers is a vague and frustrating world. It is built on the premise that you will go to a four year college for education, and that you will stay in the same state for your entire career. Try to take some sort of alternative path or, (NO!) move to another state, and life becomes difficult.
The following is true:
-I want to be licensed to teach. Regardless of whether I need that license for my current job (I don't, although I get paid more when I have it).
-I could do another alternative licensure process and try to get licensed to teach Social Studies by making a ginormous portfolio and paying some committee more than $1000 to evaluate it. Then I would be licensed to teach SS in Vermont. But if I tried to move again, who knows.
The most long-term option is to suck it up, pay tuition, and go through a real master's of education program in teaching. Then, I will get a license from Vermont, and it will be recommended by a four-year accredited institution, which, as I have sadly found out, appears to be the key to this whole mess. Imagine...
Dorothy (Becky) goes up to the gate of the Emerald City (State Department of Ed). "What do you want?" asks the creepy man.
"I want to see the wizard (get a teaching license)," replies Dorothy (Becky).
"No."
"I graduate cum laude from the honors program at a top-twenty university."
"No."
"I have experience teaching. In a low-performing district. I made SIGNIFICANT GAINS!"
"No."
"I have a master's degree in education."
"Oh?"
*mumbles* "Gifted education."
"We don't have that in this place (Vermont)."
"Well, my colleague the scarecrow here has no brain and studied bulletin-board making in his undergraduate program. He has no content expertise, but he CAN create an attendance chart and time-out corner. It took him twenty tries to pass the Praxis, and even then he just squeaked by. But he has a teaching degree from an accredited college/university."
"Well, that's a horse of a different color! Come right in!"
I think that little sketch explains perfectly the problems I have with the education teaching system today (at least as far as licensure is concerned). I'm not saying that there AREN'T good teachers who go through the traditional path. I'm not saying that all teaching programs are bad. And I'm not saying that everyone who wants to teach should be able to just jump right in. But cut me some slack -- I'm not just a bum off the street who's never been in a classroom, here.
The downside to this new option is going into debt for another degree that I don't feel like I need in order to be a good teacher. The upside is having the degree and license that will make me truly mobile and give me career options. And it sucks for the short-term, but in the long-term, I think it's a good decision for us as a family. There are a lot of ifs that have to happen for this to work, however. 1. Andy has to find a job in Vermont so we can stay here. 2. Andy has to find a job that pays what our two incomes currently make so he can support me for the year (and oh, how I cringe to say that). 3. My job has to agree to take me back, because my life will be a sad sad place if this job doesn't exist for me anymore. 4. My three recommenders have to actually WRITE the letters of recommendation.
But, for the time being, the name of the game is keeping options open. And from many angles, this appears to be a good one.
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
The big day...
We did it. I'm married. And it feels pretty much the same as it did before the wedding, except I got to see all of my friends for an awesome party, and now I get to explain how to pronounce "Proulx" for the rest of my life.
The wedding weekend was fabulous and wonderful, and when the only minor problem is a broken bustle and too few people renting cars, you know things are pretty awesome.
We started the weekend with “Christmas” with our families, since we didn’t travel home for the holidays, which was really nice. This filtered straight into New Year’s Eve, complete with a dueling families Trivial Pursuit challenge (Yes, we are nerds), dominos, champagne, Dick Clark, etc. Good fun.
I went out with girlfriends the night of the 1st for my own low-key bachelorette party. We tried to go to an Irish pub in town, but they were closing early because it was New Year’s Day (WTF?). Then, we waited for an hour at a restaurant across the street, but they couldn’t serve us quickly enough, so we ended up going out for pizza, which turned out to be awesome. After pizza, we met with my (underage) bridesmaid and went to see Benjamin Button, which was girly and ok…although the Hurricane Katrina subplot gave me some minor PTSD. All in all, it was a nice night with people I loved to see, with no drama and drunkeness which was wonderful and perfect for me.
The day before the wedding, I went to church with my mother and friend who were singing and playing for the wedding, so they could have a music rehearsal. My mother has a beautiful voice, and my friend lugged her tuba from NYC on a bus so she could play for us. Andy and I met in college marching band, and she was in the section with us, so it was lovely that she could represent! After rehearsal, I had dinner with Andy and one of our groomsmen, and went to sleep for a few hours before the real giant fun began.
Rehearsal was that night, and went well, and then, we all went out to our awesome bowl-o-rama rehearsal dinner. We spent the night bowling and chatting and eating and drinking, and had a blast. I was so relieved that our friends got along really really well, and everyone had a great time. My family beat Andy’s family in our
head-to-head bowling challenge, 
which was sweet redemption for their win at Trivial Pursuit.
Perhaps the best moment of the evening was when I looked over to see Andy and the groomsmen with bumpers up, and Andy losing the game. I went to chastise him, and he calmly explained, “No, we’re playing to see who can get the lowest score.” I cracked up. But the night was great -- we had people from college dorms and band, people from grad school, family, and most exciting, two of my friends from
The day of the wedding was cold and windy, but we had some sunshine, which has been a rare sight in
as of late. My motto of the day is, “Eh, what happens, happens,” and pictures, the ceremony, and reception went wonderfully.
We got married at the Cathedral downtown, then a limo took us to our reception at a hotel south of town, with a short stop to Ben and Jerry’s for some pints along the way. I got lots of comments and compliments on the homemade details in the wedding – our origami flowers, the cardigan I crocheted for myself and my Mom, the sash my friend and Grandma embroidered and sewed, my veil, our centerpieces/favors, etc.
It was great fun to see it all come together. The food was wonderful, the music was great, the dancing was fun, 
and afterwards, went to the hotel restaurant/bar to hang out with people.
Friday, January 2, 2009
You can do it. Channel the inner bridezilla!
Last night was my "bachelorette party," which was decidedly un-bachelorette party-like, which is exactly why it was perfect. About 9 of my friends were in early enough to hang out, so we went for drinks and dinner (which was a trial of my patience, and we just ended up eating pizza), and then went to see Benjamin Button. Nothing crazy, nothing wild, and I was nervous about how all of my friends from different walks of life would get along, but in the end, it was totally pleasant and fun.
Wedding plans are steaming ahead, today is the rehearsal and bowl-o-rama. The only minor hiccup so far has been a shortage of cars -- everyone decided NOT to rent one. D'oh! But after I get my wedding party and wedding helpers to the church for the rehearsal, then there is nothing else I can do, and I just need to rely on the taxies in town. And really, if that is my biggest worry, then I am in great shape.
I am not mentally nervous thus far, but as I have aged, I have developed a heck of a case of stage fright, and right now, the thought of everyone staring at me as I go down the aisle is taking my stomach for a ride. Also, I can almost guarantee that my voice will be shaky and I will forget to breathe during vows. But, c'est la vie. Other brides have made it through and I can, too.
Lastly, people better dance at my reception.
And when I next post, I shall be Mrs. Walter-Proulx. Oh, excuse me, I think I just threw up a little in my mouth. (From the barfiness of anticipating my new name. Not from nerves.)
PS: Chava was delightful and thoughtful enough to honor me with this Uber Amazing Blog Award.
I cannot fathom why my little blog of randomness would be so blessed, but I thank her heartily, and apologize for not dedicating an entire entry to the award right now. In leiu, I will post a picture of the cardigans I have been crocheting, which she asked to see recently:
Other wedding crafts appear below:
Wedding plans are steaming ahead, today is the rehearsal and bowl-o-rama. The only minor hiccup so far has been a shortage of cars -- everyone decided NOT to rent one. D'oh! But after I get my wedding party and wedding helpers to the church for the rehearsal, then there is nothing else I can do, and I just need to rely on the taxies in town. And really, if that is my biggest worry, then I am in great shape.
I am not mentally nervous thus far, but as I have aged, I have developed a heck of a case of stage fright, and right now, the thought of everyone staring at me as I go down the aisle is taking my stomach for a ride. Also, I can almost guarantee that my voice will be shaky and I will forget to breathe during vows. But, c'est la vie. Other brides have made it through and I can, too.
Lastly, people better dance at my reception.
And when I next post, I shall be Mrs. Walter-Proulx. Oh, excuse me, I think I just threw up a little in my mouth. (From the barfiness of anticipating my new name. Not from nerves.)
PS: Chava was delightful and thoughtful enough to honor me with this Uber Amazing Blog Award.
I cannot fathom why my little blog of randomness would be so blessed, but I thank her heartily, and apologize for not dedicating an entire entry to the award right now. In leiu, I will post a picture of the cardigans I have been crocheting, which she asked to see recently:
Other wedding crafts appear below:
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